: Here's an essay that MediaTakeOut.om got its hands on. It was written by soul singer Jill Scott:
My new friend is handsome, African-American, intelligent and seemingly wealthy. He is an athlete, loves his momma, and is happily married to a White woman. I admit when I saw his wedding ring, I privately hoped. But something in me just knew he didn't marry a sister. Although my guess hit the mark, when my friend told me his wife was indeed Caucasian, I felt my spirit...wince. I didn't immediately understand it. My face read happy for you. My body showed no reaction to my inner pinch, but the sting was there, quiet like a mosquito under a summer dress.We’re gonna leave this one alone . . .Was I jealous? Did the reality of his relationship somehow diminish his soul's credibility? The answer is not simple. One could easily dispel the wince as racist or separatist, but that's not how I was brought up. I was reared in a Jehovah's Witness household. I was taught that every man should be judged by his deeds and not his color, and I firmly stand where my grandmother left me. African people worldwide are known to be welcoming and open-minded. We share our culture sometimes to our own peril and most of us love the very notion of love. My position is that for women of color, this very common "wince" has solely to do with the African story in America.
When our people were enslaved, "Massa" placed his Caucasian woman on a pedestal. She was spoiled, revered and angelic, while the Black slave woman was overworked, beaten, raped and farmed out like cattle to be mated. She was nothing and neither was our Black man. As slavery died for the greater good of America, and the movement for equality sputtered to life, the White woman was on the cover of every American magazine. She was the dazzling jewel on every movie screen, the glory of every commercial and television show. She was unequivocally the standard of beauty for this country, firmly unattainable to anyone not of her race. We daughters of the dust were seen as ugly, nappy mammies, good for day work and unwanted children, while our men were thought to be thieving, sex-hungry animals with limited brain capacity.
We reflect on this awful past and recall that if a Black man even looked at a White woman, he would have been lynched, beaten, jailed or shot to death. In the midst of this, Black women and Black men struggled together, mourned together, starved together, braved the hoses and vicious police dogs and died untimely on southern back roads together. These harsh truths lead to what we really feel when we see a seemingly together brother with a Caucasian woman and their children. That feeling is betrayed. While we exert efforts to raise our sons and daughters to appreciate themselves and respect others, most of us end up doing this important work alone, with no fathers or like representatives, limited financial support (often court-enforced) and, on top of everything else, an empty bed. It's frustrating and it hurts!
Our minds do understand that people of all races find genuine love in many places. We dig that the world is full of amazing options. But underneath, there is a bite, no matter the ointment, that has yet to stop burning. Some may find these thoughts to be hurtful. That is not my intent. I'm just sayin'.
I think that love is love, BUT I am bothered by it because it seems like with the dudes I know, they in it because they cant handle black women. Any man that cant handle any woman is a punk. And statements like that to me cry that you a punk as a man and that white women are weak, docile, and easily controllable. That bothers me soooo much. Be with a person because you truly love them and I couldnt be happier. But choosing to be with someone because they are an "easy" race to deal with really *** me off. Get your *** up and man up already!
She is speaking outloud what a lot of intellgent, respectable BLACK women are thinking. There are great black women out here being overlooked because of the ghetto hoe's tarnishing our images and because of the white chicks who.btw, have to SAME motives and agendas as the so-called black gold-digger-girl. Black women are at the bottem of the totem pole. I am black woman, so I say that being HONEST and NOT disrespectful. Just sayin"...
I understand where she's coming from. Part of what she's saying is factual, and the rest is simply her opinion. I'd never knock Jill for that. She was bold enough to publish her feelings, which is courageous, in and of itself. Conversely, it's your right to disagree with her, and I'd also never knock anyone from doing that. It's healthy debate. Personally, I think you're going to love, whomever you're going to love. Go 'head, Jill!
@Adidas09 Why go off on the deep end and compare such with the *** of the earth black prostitutes & such. I know it's hard for you imagine a mixed heterosexual relationship where there love, respect, admiration and dignity where none of that disgusting ghetto-gagger *** takes place. That's no difference then these same type of low-life females being with a Black thug who engage in the same type activities. There is a difference between a respectable, educated, loving couple in a marriage regardless of color and the small-minded disgusting low life(s) that you are only aware of. smh @nonsense
Poor Jill. Every black man is not for every black woman, and every black woman is not for every black man. The problem is a lot of black women refuse to date outside the race, and while that is their option, it limits their mate potential. Don't fear the unknown and step outside your comfort zone sisters, then maybe you'll find the love you've been missing.
While I can appreciate what Jill has to say, she sounds the older black folks who are stuck on a plantation. Who cares when we have a large number of Black men that are either ***, on the DL, in prison, have no respect for themselves let alone women and live for the thug life & rap music. Like minds attract each other. Well, Jill how did your so-called Black Bro of a husband work for you? Get real! I'm over the black love fantasy! I'm Color-blind, with no hangups & looking for quality of character & achievements in a man. It's called progression Jill & freeing one's soul & mind. Time 2 move on
I'm Puertorican but I have to say I feel Jill Scott on that. I have a lot of respect for African American history. Having said that, I think Black women have to worry about being the best they can be as individuals and expand their minds as there is a whole world out there, a world w/ no limits and no limits as who they could be dating. This was touching though.
I agree with Jill Scott. To see any black man with a white woman is a betrayal. Someone on here said true love has no color...!!? I agree but most blacks don't know what love is. Love is the struggle to people share together that takes a life time to endure. It is not a good sexual mate who is submissive to the extent where her man does whatever he wants to her and anyone else as long as the bank account is fat. Honestly, what white girl wants the stigma of being with a black man and black kids unless there's lots of money involved or they can't find a rich white man to take of them?
Its amazing to me how all these black people want us to forget about slavery. lol. Are you serious? That was a major part of black American history. You think the Jews will ever let us forget about the holocaust? Hell no. So why is blacks and whites trying to make blacks forget about our history. Pretty or not its OUR history. You should NEVER forget your history. Besides slavery isnt even a life time removed. My great aunt still tells me about stories of living in a slave house and how her mother was a slave. You dumb ***. NEVER FORGET YOUR HISTORY BECAUSE IF YOU DO ITS BOUND TO BE REPEATED
Smh....I'm so sick of this argument. Personally I prefer black women(I'm African American). But it doesn't 'burn my soul' to see interracial couples. Love is love and it knows no color. If one truly applied that logic to ALL relationships, there *** be a 'sting'. I don't care how 'intelligently' she put it, the fact that many of our black women feel this way is f*cked up.
And f*ucked-up pie is still f*cked-up pie no matter what way you slice it.
As a black male, I understand where she's coming from. In a sense, at times, it's almost like sleeping with the enemy's daughter in the mind's of some black women, and even black men. My experience with White people have been good and bad, but I know my history. I sometimes wish a white person can feel what a Black American feel sometimes, when they roll their eyes at us, turn us down for jobs or police brutality, but I will be wrong. I feel sometimes that white people got a easy ride and black folks didnt, so I have a little resentment, but my resent is enough not to date white anything.
Yall idiots running around talking about "that was the past and we need to move on". Dont you people see the negative effects that slavery has on our people. But with the negative effects there are a lot of positive ones. Like those that choose to appreciate what our forefathers fought for to give us the blessings we have today. Like an education and the right to live and thrive. Like them black men who become successful but then oh choose to marry the very ones who are his oppressors. NEVER MARRY YOUR ENEMY. DUMMIES.
Slavery and Racial Segregation ended years ago so why do people want to keep the shackles on their feet when they're not locked? Listen racism exists true enough but it comes from all sides not just white people. I see it on MTO all the time and unless you are over 100 years old, YOU WERE NOT A SLAVE It's time to grow out of the old "conventional" way of thinking and pave a new path into the future. As long as you continue to think "Love" has a color then you continue to limit yourself. Keep an open mind and not a closed heart.
ugh.....this *** needs to chill the f*ck out.
No wonder black men think they're the ***, white chicks swoon over them, while black chicks whine and cry about why none of them want to be with them!
JEEZ WOMAN THIS IS 2010! INTERRACIAL RELATIONSHIPS ARE TAKING OVER!
I wonder if she hurts when she sees products of IR relationships, like Halle Berry, Tiger Woods (LOL)....her OWN PRESIDENT!?!?! You can call him black all ya want, but he's a swirly! LOL
-The Cablinasian (:
DO JILL NOTICE THAT ITS 2010 NOT 1934 ITS A FREE COUNTRY GET OVER IT AND LIVE WITH IT.....IM TIRED OF HEARING ALL THIS COMPLAINING AND *** WHEN U SEE A BROTHA WITH ANOTHER ETHNICITY GET OVER IT ITS GONNA HAPPEN..........SHE AND SOME OF YAH ON HERE SOUND SIMILAR TO THE (BLACK VERSION) OF THE ***.K.*** TO ME WITH ALL THIS HATRED TOWARDS WHITE WOMEN.
It's funny I just wrote a paper about interracial dating. SMH @ a lot of you making generalizations. Although most people can sympathize with what Jill is saying, hell I can and I am a product of IR dating. But at the same time America, Black America will NOT be able to move on from the wrong that whites have done if we keep blaming everything on them.
I guess many people don't see that. The more we let things like that DIVIDE our race the more WE will not succeed as a whole. Only WE can do better for ourselves and for our future.
And you know u always see a white girl riding for a black man if he's on drugs and she is too. I say sisters let the *** be. Get your self right with the lord because the *** that we're enduring on earth is temporary, heaven is forever. Be content that u are alone because these white girls have to share these men but they don't care. *** aren't faithful to them either. Don't compromise ur standards just to have a man. Like Deelicious said, be with a *** with money or don't be with noone, because a *** broke or rich delivers the same issues, infedilty regardless.
The Sad thing is that educated people such as Jill Scott are ignorant to the reality, that this is what some many people died for when fighting for civil rights. THE FREEDOM TO BE FREE! regardless what prefrence when we choose a lover! it is 2010 BLACK,WHITE,CHINESE we are Fn E Q U A L! so jill scott is a BIGOT plain and simple
@ChasityLove
Speak child. Love is the struggle. Love is being there for your little black boys and little black girls. Not raising Beckys kids. Fu(*** that our black boys need our black men to give back to them. Why give to a community that doesnt need it. Especially when you didnt even come from THAT community. They killing our black boys left and right and the best thing you house *** gers can do is marry their sisters and daughters? GTFOH.
Who cares! If a white woman is dumb enough to marry a black man let her! Its not going to last, he's not going to be faithful, and he's not going to raise the children which he is so quick to create! You black women really need to learn how to be soft, feminine and lady like and not sneaker wearing, gum cracking hood rats then you find a successful man of any color!
CDEXO8 U seem like an college educated brother but u r still confused. Slavery is practiced on a whole new level. U don't have to be physically restrained to be oppressed. Dude the products of slavery is the mentality u and most blacks express everyday. Ur comments prove that u have a slave mentality. All *** say slavery ended long ago.
I feel like we didnt ask to be brought here to America. A lot of black men, and a few women, are brainwashed, by white society, to think that white women look better. To me, our community cant afford to have all the good men leave out and marry out, that leaves unwed mothers and unreared kids that grow up and rob people and end up in jail. The black family need unity and a black man and black woman period to survive in America. We have real enemies here that have oppressed and brainwased us. Im not a racist, but its the truth. Love is love, but think about what I said..........
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@ emmettmays85, hey Sexy - missed YOU!!! MMMWAH =P
@ NikkiLaFleur, I feel you. But the problem with that is, that the benefits of slavery are still being reaped by many whites - they got several hundred years of free labor off our backs, and it wasn't that long ago. Also, they are still doing many things to hurt the black communities and break up the family unit, which is their only way of overcoming & manipulating us. Many of their tactics have worked and still working...
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Im a single mom. Some days i love it and some days i hate. But whats so cool is I have friends that support me and mine. My girlfriend (who is married), her husband and i get together and tutor our children together. And sometimes when I look around see the progress we are making with our children, i see why they say "It takes a village to raise a child". We need our black men. White women dont. Our black boys need our black men. If everyone would stop being so selfish and only worrying about themselves then maybe our communities wouldnt be what they are today.
angelaheiressnyc hey baby , yeah u are right i notice when dealing with black and white relationships, according to hypocrite *** on here a black women and white man marry out of love , but a black that marries a white women , oh he is self hating, he hate his mother (i hate that *** rant) or he ashamed of his blackness, a whole bunch of *** that is never thrown up at a black women who is with a white man
Jill has some amazing opinions that are to me, True. From the history of treatment of black women til today how they are treated. My opininon, some are truely degrading themselves for attention. We all have a choice but for blackman to be with a white woman, he feels that he's arrived and not only being with a white person but to be with her and talk negatively about blackwomen your basically including your mother, grandmother and every black woman that went throught hell to raise you.
I agree what she is saying and why she's saying it. I kind of wince when i see it too. I'm from Washington state, and there they consider white women "top notch" cause they got money to trick off and all of that. That i don't like. But if a black man really loves his white woman and isn't trying to use her to be something he could never be then it's love and you have to respect that.
ME TOO GIRL. JILL YOU ARE AN OLD SOUL. BLACK WOMEN DID EVERYTHING POSSIBLE TO SAVE OUR BLACK MEN SO THEY COULD SURVIVE FROM SLAVERY TILL NOW, AND THIS IS HOW THEY REPAY ALL OF OUR EFFORTS! WE WORKED WHEN THEY COULD NOT, WE BROKE OUR BACKS AND PUT UP WITH ALL OF THE *** FROM THE WHITE RACE JUST SO OUR SONS COULD MAKE IT. IT'S JUST TOO MUCH TO WRITE AND TO MUCH TO TAKE. SO BLACK MALES DO YOU........GOD IS WATCHING!!!
@Bezsenny
Your completely right and I understand that. But I just feel as if too many people use slavery as an excuse. But then again that mentality is learned at home, so many children don't get the chance to think otherwise. But in order to do better for ourselves, people have to let that mentality go and move forward instead of staying in the past. It's obviously doing nothing for our race.
Every valid point that was made in this thread I understand. But at the same time it's that mentality that's not getting us anywhere
@emmettmays85: exactly! I mean,if you're going to be so against IR relationships/procreation then be an equal opportunity discriminator because it's pretty hypocrite for a bw to allegedly be so "hurt" or up in arms whenever it involves a bw/ww but when it's the other way around? It's all good & feels somewhat validated I guess? Please!
I feel where Jill is coming from. I think every black women gets the feeling in her body. Its almost a reflex. Perhaps its an innate feeling of wanting to preserve the race and wanting to do it with a successful black man. However, black men are doing this because they know how jealous we black women are. Ignore them. Stop giving black men and white women power. Hyping them up. We call ourselves strong black women then act like it Dammit. While your at it, open your mind up to dating non black men. Maybe some of the bitterness will dissapate.
Why is it that negroes who disagreee with IR relationships always have to bring up things that happen in slavery times??? ***, this ain't slavery times, and you don't know any slaves. I'm not saying forget your history, but F*CK!!!!!! Can you just give me a better reason than that for disagreeing with it. White folks ain't givin' a f*ck about you still being ***-hurt over some terrible things that have happened to our people so long ago. Stop lumping everyday people with those that did these things. And don't reply because I won't respond, you'll be wasting your time.
I agree with QueenieE to the FULLEST! You can put lipstick on a pig, but its still a pig. Make your words elegant but it's still racism. I have been in love with black women since day one, usually more than my own Latina sisters. I have a son with a beautiful black woman and the love we shared was one of the most powerful things I have ever felt. My soul winces when I read this heifer make it seem our love wasn't better than any love I could've had with my own or my girl with hers... This is ***... My love will not take the blame for the past or for anyone!
Jill Scott *** ya jelous azz up u just haten cuz u cant get a successful black man. Yall black women always puttin black men down yall think theres not alot of successful black men i bet theres more successful black men den there is successful black women & dats bcuz a black man has a white women there 2 to support him 100%.
Black women it is imperative that you get a good education before you even consider having children. Live for today and tomorrow because there is nothing you can do about the way other adults live their lives. Concentrate on yourselves first. Take care of your health and stay out of those trifling clubs filled with trifling men who only want to party and shrink from responsibility. Ours sons are not graduating from school. They are going to prison and come out worst than they went in.
Research on IR relationships??? LOL
You can't generalize it. It's not like it's a bad thing either, just look at all the great offspring that has come from IR relationships!
-Halle Berry -BARACK OBAMA (yup...he's MIXED) -Tiger Woods (aside from the scandal) -Jimi Hendrix -W.E.B Dubois -Fredrick Douglas -Henry Oswanna Tanne -Alexandre Dumas -Alicia Keys -Lenny Kravitz
and MANY MORE.....
[link to external website removed]
As far as I see it, IT'S ALL GOOD! lol
Furthermore, my intelligence and integrity as a black man is insulted when our race(black men and women), feel that any black person involved in an IR 'sold-out' or 'betrayed' their race. Isn't that the same kind of stereotyping and categorizing that we've become so angry at white people for doing? Yes, there are black men and women who date outside their race for less than honorable reasons, but you *** let a few bad apples spoil the bunch.
Read about slavery, learn how it was accomplished and what they did to strip the slaves of their culture and their sense of family, pride, and love. Read about how they lived and viewed life. Analyze your life, not the physical, but evaluate the mental processes that you exercise to solve problems choose mates and view family and culture. Then find out if correlates with the forced behaviors of slaves.
It is good to remember the past, but living in history in the present will only make you bitter and depressed. Jill Scott is only making us appear weeping and moaning and I am so finished with that mentality. We don't own black men so let them do what they want so long as they are responsible. I just want them to grow up and take responsibility for the children they bring into this world.
@SaintJames What other reason do you need as to why we feel this way? Slavery wasnt enough????? Really?
And YES the south is still very much separated. Yall runnin around acting like separation doesnt exist and that white folks want the best for our black boys. lol.
PLEASE OPEN A BOOK AND THEN TAKE A TRIP SOMEWHERE BESIDES YOUR BACKYARD.
I'm really laughing at some of you bw on here! If you haven't noticed the bm that are successful and about something besides hood rat ways want a CLASSY and ELEGANT woman, not a chick that would fight at the drop of a hat! You bw really need to learn some manners and have some goals and aspirations because becoming a video vixen on a *** "model". Get an education and some sophistication and you get a man worth something!
Oh and I agree with SaintJames about living in the past. Yes our ancestors did suffer horrible times during slavery but we are so far past that now. It really irritates me when I hear a black person rant and rave continuously about the WM and how everything is his fault. Is this what Dr. King fought for? I don't think so. Most of us no longer live in segregation, I have white friends who I care about. It's time for some of us to let go of that grip we have on the past!
Black women for the most part do not care about ww bm. Its only when its thrown in our face in a negative way to make us feel inferior is when we have the issue. Stop comparing us. It is true. I post on non black blogs, I never hear other races tearing down their women. What's really good black men? Do you need attention? Seems as if you all are acting out. As hard as you may try. I'm really tired of these threads deemed to make black women look desperate, lonely, pathetic, and bitter.
In these days anyone can acquire wealth, but does that mean u r truly free? You pay off your house u still owe the goverment money, if u don't pay ur taxes, the state has the authority to sell ur house to someone else for the cost of back taxes. So is ownership a realization in America? What about ur car? If you don't pay your taxes u can't drive. It's better to enslave an entire country then a specific race, because the only war to be fought is against the government? But who's "foolish" enough to start a revolt?
A lot of brothers can't handle this essay by Jill,cause they can't handle the TRUTH
They are never for holding the community together,but dividing it.Even when they have MIXED kids they are never around for them,look at the clebrities,Alicia Keys,Halle berry,Barrack Obama,all grew up without their BLACK fathers.
I wonder really if certain black men,will ever GROW up,and face up to their RESPONSIBILITIES
Another thing..even though what Jill wrote was powerful..why is she so concerned about bm dating/marrying outside their race if she's in a relationship? Isn't she happy? Her family is all that should matter to her @ the time & how does she feel about the POTUS? He's a product of a biracial union..just saying
@CDEX08
You know why no one can hold you down?????? Wait for it wait for it..... Is because your ancestors fought for the right for you to have a decent education and uplift yourself. And even if you are from a mixed heritage, as i am, then it was someone elses great grand parents that fought the inequalities so that little black boys and little black girls only hold back would be themselves and not from a lack of an education or opportunity. Think on that for a min.
@ezra Thank you love. These fools need mad education.
My nationality, you mean AMERICANS??? LOL You hate Americans??? LOL
And I am Cablinasian, that's right, Black, White, ***.American, and Asian. (:
And there are plenty of IR relationships outside of "google" that do make it, but it's hard trying to show you on a comment board of a d@mn blog. DUH!
And with all the *** about the "one drop rule" and taking MY MIXED PEOPLE as BLACK....I can say whatever the f*ck I want on here! LOL
TheTruth,
It was a time black women couldn't get on TV or dance in videos. Who were the video vixens then? lol another brother or sister with a slave mentality. "White people can do no wrong even when their the origin of all wrong in America". Slaves couldn't express the culture or values they were beaten and murdered for it.
@ the truth, how dare you put black women in category of vixen. What about 30+ year old black men still living at home without a pot to *** in holding onto his dreams of being an aspiring rapper, still hustling, and meanwhile has 2 to 3 baby mothers, in and out of jail, high school drop ouy. Some of you need to grow up. Now, how does it feel to be stereotyped. By the way, the black men that I described above, non of the white women are checking for. Except maybe for the hard dik because you wouldn't be able to afford the bubblegum . Get your money up!
First of all their are alot of money making black men married to black women. Why ppl called a man making alot of money a successful black man? You don't really have to have a milli to be successful. For those with common sense knw that success comes within. You can be a person making $50K a year and be successful. Its about how you carry yourself as a person. Raising your kids, takin care of business. My paps doesn't make $100K a year but he is a successful black man, because he raised good kids who all went to college, never got put in jail, and majority of the times do the right thing.
Jill is one of those angry over-weight woman who can't keep a man. Every time you turn around she wagging her finger in somebody's face jumping up to argue and fight. Her husband dumped her azz and her baby daddy quit her? She hard to please and get along with that's why. Her personal life is a mess and she looking around to blame somebody.
evilangel im so tired of hearin hoes black women explore your options , like black women that are single are holding out for the right black guy that is 100% ***, I can assure 99% of the hoes who are single claiming they waiting on the right black men would not deny the advances of a white guy, the myth that single black women are holding out for black men is getting old and tired dont nobody wanna hear that ***
@blackberrybiz Ok not to put my business out there but lets go there. I'm a southern boy who has worked on a farm, raised animals, grew food to eat, worked in tobacco fields to raise money. My grandparents taught me about slavery and what they went through. My Mother told me how she had to walk to school while the white kids spit and them while they RODE by on the bus. So don't think I don't have a clue where I come from cause I've been there physically and mentally. I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth I worked hard to get where I am.
WHO GIVES A SH!T BLACK GUYS GO FOR THE WHITE WOMAN...THATS WHAT BLACK MEN USUALLY DO WHEN THEY HAVE A LOT OF MONEY..NOTHING NEW.INSTEAD OF WHINING ABOUT WHAT RACE THE BLACK MAN IS WITH OTHER THAN A BLACK WOMAN,BLACK WOMEN SHOULD BE WITH A WHITE MAN AND CALL IT EVEN.IM HAPPY BEING WITH MY BYFD AND HE IS WHITE..BUT IT DOESNT MATTER.HE TREATS ME VERY GOOD..AND I CAN CARELESS WHAT SOCIETY THINKS.JILL CAN GET OVER IT.
Even though I have thoughts about mixed marriage's, I dont think every black man or white women is toghter so the black man can use them. I have seen some white men married to Black women, and the Black woman is running things. I have seen sista'in *** being beaten by their white husbands and lover's too also. Sometimes relationships start off by lust or infactuation, and the relationship ends bad.
Plus really on the black women. Lets b honest some of y'all head is up ur a$$es. Some of y'all don't deserve a good man. Some of y'all don't know what is GOOD MAN IS. Its not about money, looks, and body. Its about common sense. Some of y'all don't know how to love a GOOD Man. Y'all give them away. "He doesnt act tough" Real men hide their toughness until its time to defend our family. Be real, when y'all are 14-17 y'all on the thugs, so guys start being thugs. So when some of y'all getcha *** whipped or have a couple of kids, then you want a good black man to save you. HELLL NO.
@ Evilangel, you sound dumb! I don't even hate when I see a white women with a black man she can have him! Less stress for me to deal with. My WHITE boyfriend is leaps and bounds ahead of black men who are TWICE his age! I agree black men ain't sh!t, however you black women need to start demanding more from them then d!ick!
@ChasityLove
Because its the same sh it the media tells us that everyone is jelous of us Americans. You know all the *** about us being a "free" nation and all. I have no reason in the world to be jealous of a whyte woman. They are so recessive and only a mutation of the black woman. So Beckie's get over yourselves.
*** I try so hard to be positive but this ignorance on this site kinda pulls me in. Got to work on that.
I think you're missing the point, shes not a racist or a bigot...what she is saying is that black men seem to have lost love for black women and you can clearly see it with the comments on here from men, its disgusting. I've never dated outside my race and I am open to it but at the end of the day I am a black woman who adores and loves my black men period. Thats what's lacking in black men. I've never in my life heard a black man say they date outside their race but love their black women. They always have some negative remark about why they date outside their race.
@clarkthink-When you posted that comment I started singing "Halo" by Beyonce...! Mad respect baby...! We all know this thread is subjected to reaching 900 hits by 12:00pm...The WW posting their slick a** remarks will easily make the muthaf*cka reach 1000!!!! I'm not even going to post a response for the topic because it's about to get heated on this be-i be-i....
I don't give a *** how Jill scott or any body else feels about who I date. I have never owned a slave and none of you have ever been slaves. Fyi Africans were not the only slaves and white Americans were not the only slave owners. Africans are still getting sold in to slavery today but not to Americans. If I want to Lay down next to a black man then I will. You don't like it? Go fu.ck yourself cuz I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU LIKE.
@blubabiecutie28
Not all rich black men go for white women. Some go for white women because some white women put out the goodie fast. I know alot of money making bruhs and they have good black wives. WHY? because those wives are independent and dont have the ego to go with it. Plus they understand what a good man is. And they fulfilled their husband needs. You barely have women who know how to be the true black women like them old skool women back in the day. Some of y'all call them "run overs" but they are not. Husband do for them as well as wives for her husband.
...there goes that lack of love and respect. And black women lets be truthfull....u know why it burns...because when you are black woman who loved a black man who left you to raise your children all alone, then you see a black man with a white woman happy and taking care of that family..thats what burns. Think about it..if you were in a happy, stable relationship right now would you even comment the same way? I know I wouldn't. I'm a single mom raising a black boy by myself, thats where the burn comes from and guess what I still love my black men!
@ ezra,
I know right. It was awesome meeting you. Hit me up because we need to keep in touch. pvtashe@yahoo
Well lovely black people I have to part and raise my strong black young son. We are going to brunch so I can brake a little knowledge off and then run some errands. Peace and love to you my beautiful black people.
Being biracial hearing this stuff always *** me off! Why do people always go back to slavery? Like any of us were there! Why can't you just love who you love? Would she rather it be like back in the day when blacks couldn't be near whites? Let me stop before I go off on this trick. Her soul should be burning for having a child with a *** black man. I guess that's better than a straight white man.
A lot of you'll sound plain crazy. Knowing your history is not "living in the past." Some of you suffer from what I call "the new negro complex," meaning you want to act like you are so color blind and don't understand why some Black people feel as they do concerning black-white relationships. Yes, people of diff races can fall in love, but I'm not going to support IR at the expense of being historically ignorant or dismissive of some black people's feeling, legit in many cases, when they feel negatively towards it.
@emmettmays85
I dont think YOU are disgusting. Just the things you choose to say out of your mouth especially toward our black women. I know what your preference is and you prefer IR dating but dont dog us out every chance you get. I love being black. Im full of so much diversity and I have a strength in me that hails from my ancestors (the black line). I have and am still enduring white american hatered and it pains me to see such a beautiful black man choosing his words the way you do. But please know that when you insult women, some little black boy and girl are watching and taking note.
Maybe its not that ww are stealing bm its just that ignorant bw want to have children with other ignorant bm. Make better choices with who you choose to f*ck an maybe your children will have fathers and that bed wouldn't be empty. I don't feel bad for any woman whose father isn't in their childs life. You can tell by someone character what type of person they are. So have a baby with Ray Ray and see what happens.
@blackberrybiz I co-sign..that's what I'm saying, u want to date outside your race cool, but don't come up with reasons that belittle black woman as the excuse as to why you do it. That's so uncalled for! That's what makes us bitter, why is it so hard to love and respect your black women in conjunction with dating outside your race? Sounds like self hate especially when you came from a black woman. My black son can date and love whomever he wants but you best believe he is going to be taught to love and respect the black woman no matter what
Forreal bills must be due because a good race debate always does the trick. Jill Scott kills me she's one of those people who reads nonstop about slavery and history and thinks she knows it all. Unless you were there *** your mouth. We get the gist of slavery so enough with the "massa" *** and field and house ***!ggers. "Oh our sisters have been raped for 400 years blah blah blah...".
blackberrybiz baby how do u know my preference ? im not even into white *** that much there are some cute ones but for most part no, also for me using the word *** thats just how i talk , i always been like this the only women in my family i havent called a *** was my sista and my auntie(she would blow me away). also blackberrybiz u too cute to be worried about who other *** ***
@Ezra_Yisrael1970:
Agreed. I bought her book of poetry a few years ago and it is OFF THE HOOK.
Jill is only INTELLIGENTLY echoing the sentiments of millions of Black women. Of course most Black men NEVER want to hear us call them out on this, so get ready for the black male rebuttle about how we are angry, bitter blah blah blah.
By the way brothas, I HAVE a man and a good successful one at that, and I strongly agree with Jill about this topic. So you can save calling me bitter for another day.
Y'all praising the white men like they GODS GIFT. LMFAO. Men are all the same. Some of them are good, bad. Women are all the same. Some of them are good, bad. If you think white men are better than black men then you need to wake up seriously. Y'all forget y'all haven't MET EVERY BLACK MAN IN THE WORLD. Plus females what every you like men will go for it. You like thugs, men are gonna be thugs. You like cars, men are gonna get good cars. Its all about you. If women start say I want a good man at the age of 16 and REALLY MEAN IT. then you will have them.
It's true but interracial dating does not bother me what bothers me is the men who still carry the slave mentality that white is right and black is ugly, black is dirty, black is nothing. When they put all white women in a "beautiful" category, and black women in the "dirty ugly hoe" category. I've heard and seen it myself so I know what I am talking about.
I hate this kind of talk it makes us look bitter, clingy and filled with self-pity and we are NOT. I could care less who Black men associate with, I just want them to be happy and self-reliant. Take care of themselves and their children irregardless of the race of their spouse. We have a man of color in the White House who came into the world through the womb of a white woman who nurtured, loved and raised him when his father refused to.
Mto this is the best thin i have ever seem for awhile from yall but its true these black dudes need to get beat in they head u could like who ever makes u happy but they always seem to pick the dum white women who dont give a sh*t i jus dont kno how some of dem reach fame without a brain makes no sense to me
What makes me upset is that the brother's can't handle what this beautiful black woman is saying, that's why they are hating on her. She is speaking the truth about the black situation in this country. Yeah it's 2010 and you can love anyone, but what about the fact that our women have been on our sides from the beginning helping us to fight the powers that be. Through every struggle they have persevered, and what do they get? nothing but crumbs from this society. I see her point it's not fair for the black man not to support his woman...she's more than a hoe and a trick...she's royalty!
I SO AGREE WITH HER BECUZ SUM BLACK MEN DO IT AND PUT THEIR OWN RACE DOWN IF ITS GENUINE THEN THATS GOOD 4 THEM BUT 90% OF THE TIME IT HAS SUM NEGATIVE CONNOTATION ITS EITHER BECUZ "SISTAS HAVE 2 MUCH DRAMA" OR BECUZ THEY SECRETLY HATE THEMSELVES AND THEIR RACE BECUZ THEY WERE LEAD 2 BELIEVE THAT WHITE OR LIGHT IS SUM HOW SUPERIOR THEN BLACK & BROWN BUT WHATEVA PPL WHO THINK LIKE THAT AINT LIVING 100% ANYWAY AND EVENTUALLY IT'LL SLOWLY EAT THEM ALIVE INSIDE SO UNTIL THAT DAY FU.CK EM!!!!
I am a white woman who dates black men. I personally have never had any issues with that. I will date anyone who is respectful to me and to other people. Honestly if it is not your husband or boyfriend or even your son it *** affect you. I can see a little hurt but I can say that I get irritated when I see someone who looks like a respectable person with trash. I cant stand that especially when I see a bm with a ww because she just looks like she thinks she is cute off of that when she looks ignorant but if he looks like it too then let it be. I dont date bm who only date ww yes they
I love Jill Scott and all BUT it sounds like she LIKED HER FRIEND AND WAS A BIT BITTER about him with a WHITE WOMAN!!!!!!!!!!!! I agree some black men are with white women for the wrong reason but some that's just what they fell for! GET OVER THIS RACIST VIEW.... in this age you'll be surprise not seeing mix couples and mix babies.
There's many black dudes out there who only deal with black females. We all have our soulmate and why stick to one race? Love has no color!!!!
I love my BLACK husband and all our mix babies to come LMAOO
** Let's focus on this CORRUPT Government!
Jill Scott has always been a hard talking and acting woman who drives her men away. It is either her way or the highway and her opinion is supposed to rule over everybody else's. If she allows what strangers do to affect her soul then that is her own *** problem. She is just the type of woman that most men don't want and a lot of these black dudes had mothers like her so now they don't want no parts of that kind of woman. Always jumping up in a mans face being loud and angry. It's an ugly way to behave and ya'll need to change.
U GUYS NEED TO WAKE THE *** UP...RACISM IS ALIVE AND WELL...YOU GUYS SAY ITS 2010 WE NEED TO MOVE ON AND PROGRESS BUT IF YOU GO TO ANY WHITE PROCLAIMED MEDIA SITES LIKE TMZ YOU CAN SEE WHITE PEOPLE...MEN AND WOMAN...SAYING THE MOST RACIST SLURS AND TERMS TOWARDS BLACK CELEBRITIES THAT ARE POSTED. ONE THEY DID ON KELLY ROWLAND MANY WHITE PEOPLE ESPECIALLY WOMAN SAID AND I QUOTE "TAKE THAT NASTY HOOD RAT WEARING DIRTY PROJECT MONKEY BACK TO AFRICA BECAUSE THIS IS AND ALWAYS WILL BE A WHITE COUNTRY...WHITE POWER"....SO FOR BLACK MEN AND WOMEN WHO ARE INVOLVED IN IR...DON'T BEING IN DENIAL!!!!
Just by looking at the post on here the world can see how divided we are as a people and that's the problem....We wonder why the world see us as lost, well it's because we don't support one another. Black people are just like the Democrats that can't seem to get their heads out the crack of their azz...making it easy for the so called powers to hold us back. Wake the hell up black people!!!!!
do think that they are all that and are always making race issues about stuff. The men i date usually dont date ww because of what ever reason and those are the men who still love bw but they never bring up race issues to me. Not all bm who date outside there race are sellouts. As long as your happy you should be with whoever like i said the only time i cant stand certain things is when one race thinks they are better than everyone else because they can get someone outside their race.
..and black men you should feel offended that white women are only looking your way when you got your sh*t together. That's why you see it so much in the celebrity spotlight. I don't them looking your way when you're making $12 per hour living in you mother's basement. But black women, we take you any way any how because we have a love for you that you don't have for us. And its true, Obama was raised by a white woman and look who he married
@ TheTruth052489 I KNOW THATS RIGHT!!! Same thing here--- LEAPS AND BOUNDS! Shame on them for chasing after raggumuffins, having low standards to begin with, and being jealous that those same raggedy dudes don't want them. They better broaden their horizons if they don't plan on repeating that same vicious struggling single momma cycle.
U GUYS NEED TO WAKE THE FCUK UP...RACISM IS ALIVE AND WELL...YOU GUYS SAY ITS 2010 WE NEED TO MOVE ON AND PROGRESS BUT IF YOU GO TO ANY WHITE PROCLAIMED MEDIA SITES LIKE TMZ YOU CAN SEE WHITE PEOPLE...MEN AND WOMAN...SAYING THE MOST RACIST SLURS AND TERMS TOWARDS BLACK CELEBRITIES THAT ARE POSTED. ONE THEY DID ON KELLY ROWLAND MANY WHITE PEOPLE ESPECIALLY WOMEN SAID AND I QUOTE "TAKE THAT NASTY HOOD RAT WEARING DIRTY PROJECT MONKEY BACK TO AFRICA BECAUSE THIS IS AND ALWAYS WILL BE A WHITE COUNTRY...WHITE POWER"....SO FOR BLACK MEN AND WOMEN WHO ARE INVOLVED IN IR...DON'T BEING IN DEN
to all of ya'll sayin racism doesnt exist and we need blk women need to stop living in the past well hush up cuz it does to exist everyday with these *** white people they are too very racist I kno a blk guy who dated this white girl and he would tell me how she tried to belittle blk people like she was better than them trust me there are very racist people out there and i cant lie at times i feel very racist too becuz spanish, caucasion, indian and which ever other race thats out there feel they are above blk.
@angelaheiressnyc Exactly. We don't do that now. Because you do got the lames who dawg the sistas and you got the sistas who are forever mad at the lames and maddness goes to their daughters. So the daughters grow up thinking All black men ain't ish. I didn't grew up like that. Even the single black mothers in my community are not on that hate level. Nobody is teaching the values no more. And ppl don't wanna listen to the good values. I remember how black women and men wouldn't bash each other. But when Waiting To Exhale came out, it became a movement.
@jayanderson07:
I think its a SHAME that you've been rejected by a couple of black women or a few relationships didn't work out - that today you have such a sour taste in your mouth when it comes to speaking about what say is "some" of black women.
WHY not respond to the Black women who are intelligent, respectful, educated? WHAT would be your response to us? WHY are you SO QUICK to call out black women who supposedly have negative attributes? Is that all you've ever dealt with If so, then thats YOUR issue with who YOU choose to date. But don't come on here making generalizations about YOUR SISTERS - BLACK mothers, grandmothers, aunts. You should AUTOMATICALLY hold Black women higher than that in your mind. Think about WHY you are so quick to talk about the “bad” apples. Something has been brainwashing your mind brotha.
Okay...I'm so tired of black women saying that white women are EASILY CONTROLLABLE, DOCILE AND WEAK...AND THAT WE SUCK D*CK!!! YOU KNOW WHAT YALL NEED TO GET AT YALL MEN AND BE MAD AT THEM. I AM A PROUD WHITE WOMAN AND BABY I AM NOT DOCILE WEAK OR EASILY CONTROLLABLE! I AM JUST AS STRONG AS ANY BLACK WOMAN OR ANY OTHER RACE OF WOMAN AND MY NAME AINT BECKY EITHER! I DONT SUCK D*CK MY DEARS! AINT NO FREAK NEITHER! WANT RACIAL EQUALITY AND THEN BE MAD AT A WHITE WOMAN WHO ATTENDS A MOSTLY "BLACK" EVENT/CLUB THAT DONT MAKE NO SENSE! I AINT BETTER THAN U AND U AINT BETTER THAN ME!
She's being honest, and though i have love 4 all races, its the truth. As is, Black women already outnumber black men in America. So, when the small number of black men we DO have flock to get a white/Asian/Latina woman the minute they get 2 a degree and 2 nickels in their pocket, it does make us feel like we're not good enough. Then, if that weren't bad enough, certain blk men run smear campaigns against us (blk women seems 2 do the same thing too) I strongly blieve this is what whitey wants us to do, bcuz it is the best way to kill of our race.
im not saying that blk men need to date only blk women bcuz honestly i chose to stop caring becuz the pain u feel is heavy on my chest and i refuse to let it bother me anymore. but I feel blk people dont stick together like we should and mainly our men with the women i feel that the blk race is soon to be extinct there r gonna be so many mixed babies in the years to come and I just wondr if i should have a kid at all in a world like this where my blk people cant even stand together most blk kids dont feel pretty only the mixed girls really get looked at or the lighter ones this world has reall
My only problem with this way of thinking from black women is how they define (successful/good black man)…..I have 2 jobs one of which is at sears. now whenever I’m asked what I do and I say that I work at sears I immediately get the stair of inferiority…..every guy knows this look lol….it’s when a women doesn’t have enough respect for you to look you in the eye so she looks threw you as if you as if she was looking into the future….needless to say that when I’m at work at sears I strike out every time I step up to the plate…..now my real job is the money maker…I’m a longshoremen (casual) and whenever I say that I get the red carpet treatment….all of a sudden I go from being viewed as a “coon” to one of the good ones….someone that’s “on the same level”
the most crazy part is that the white girls and Latina girls at my sears job are more willing to give me the time of day then the black girls….then once people found out that I have a real job the sisters wanted to spend some time….at that point I saw threw their BS and it was clear that they don’t give a dame about a black man….they just want a man with money…..so I ask if it’s ok for black women to go for what they want then why can’t black men
@allergic2fake A VIDEO? Its discrimination everywhere. He didn' use a fat black beauty chick or fat white chick. Look at them R&B chiks videos they don't use *** good black men. He is tall lite or dark with muscles. You gotta stop with that bitterness, because thats the problem with some sistas now. Too mad and bitter. NOT GONNA GET YOU NOWHRE Because a good black man don't want a bitter woman. So you just making it worst. Stop the bitterness LET IT GO. I'm good man, 5'7, nice body, I don't get pick because I'm *** to alot of sistas and because I'm not a thug or a money machine. SO WHAT
conditioned our minds to see what beauti is so i feel a lot of black men think light skin is beautiful and long hair is too so whoever dont have long hair or light skin is beneath them. Blk I think would date out their race but other race men to me find us disgusting some of them not all but me as a blk woman is all for dating outside my race cuz blk men really turn me off wit the beckys and ***. but i get jill and where she is coming from but i dont care anymore cuz my happiness lies within me
I don't think black women have a problem with black men dating white women.
It's an ISSUE when black men act like white women are "EASIER" to deal with.
It's an ISSUE when black men ONLY date white women.
It's an ISSUE when there's a TREND of Black men reaching a certain success level and KEEP deciding to marry or date white women.
It's an ISSUE when black men have a PROBLEM with strong successful intelligent black women speaking their mind and would RATHER a meek white woman on their arm who they think wont make a fuss.
It's an issue when you all come RUNNIN back to us when the ish hits the fan in your white marriage and you wanna run back to the black community for support. But OF COURSE black women REGARDLESS of how we are portrayed, will ALWAYS be their to support black men. If ONLY we too could expect the same kind of UNCONDITIONAL SUPPORT from black men.
what up MTO? ok, first of all jill is a beauitful intellgent woman i am in shock wow! to hear that from jill i would never expected that from her and i thought she would be openminded woman but even famous ppl have an opinion i strongly disagree on her comment she disencougreing people of race for being happy free s to be themself this of america it free to country.... and i do think jill is jealous its personal
Notice how alot of women on mto have a problem with black men dating white woman but the moment mto puts up news about a black women dating a white man then its all you go girl and good for her!?! please believe in my experience those same women who have a problem with black men dating white women be the same chicks whos quick to turn a black man down whos tryna holla no matter how respectful his approach is but than your see them smiling in a white guys face, taking his number.....
Also, I am a black woman that loves my black father- no self hatred here. But the rest of these no good loser black men out there who only want to cheat, lie, have no goals, don't want to get an education, treat women badly. . .yall can have'em. Even the ones that are doing well are egomaniacs because black women are so thirsty for them that they have no reason to settle down. The year is 2010- not 1810. You segregation loving black women better wake up. Your truly "good black man" is 1 out of 1000. Adapt to your environment and broaden your horizons.
@kerrin, your statement could not be any more incorrect! Asians and hispanics DO NOT marry outside of their race commonly! And this is based on facts, not some faulty *ass survey. Sure, Europeans are viewed as the most "elite" race, and are preferably #1 world wide. But Asians AND Hispanics as a whole do not practice common interracial marriage ( in other words, they ain't down with the swirl, oggaahhhh! ) - shenehneh So do some more research before you try to sound like you know what you're talking about!
BLACK WOMEN DATE WHITE MEN! SO WHY IN THE HELL IS JILL SCOTT MAD AT BLACK MEN AND WHITE WOMEN? MY ANCESTORS DIDNT OWN NO SLAVES CAUSE OUR IRISH *** WERE BEING DISCRIMINATED AGAINST ALSO! U CAN LOOK THAT UP! MY FAMILY WAS IN THE SLUMS OF NEW YORK RUFFIN IT OUT WITH BLACK FOLK! JILL *** THE *** UP!!!!!!!!!!!
Hmmmmmm, I understand where Jill Scott is coming from. But for us to move forward as a Black community, we need to be able to learn to demarcate between acknowledging what happened in the past and being educated about how that transcends to the present day versus still being mentally bound by the shackles of the past. I think a lot of people who are posted here do not know the difference.
Because if some of you were properly informed of how historical forces of oppression shape modern society then this interracial dating point will be moot
@misshugrad Let me check you for a second. First of all, i did not generalize any women. Notice when I say SOME. SOME. Why? because they are some good ones and some bad one. I'm responding to the ones who have question about black men not being good black men because their are some good men but they are not getting looked because its so much focus on the bad and some women are focusing on them too much. the women in my past didn't leave a bad taste in my mouth because i'm not a bitter brother. I have my black women on the HIGH. Baby you really don't know me to try to check me. Seriously.LISTEN
I come from Brooklyn NY in an almost all black area East NY where I was the minority!!! My husband is a Black Man of West Indian decent. I am of mixed latina and white race but I am fair skinned. I see the racism from Black Women and at sometimes it almost starts a fight cause I'm not a softy like a BECKY!! Slavery is over! People can date who ever they want when I see white guys or latin guys with Black girls I'm all for it! Some of YALL NEED TO GET OVER IT!!!!And my husband aint a saint he's a criminal who changed his life but all black women when the see us frown up there face.get over it!!
@emmettmays85 Yes i am white and lilrisha is my nickname. My name is Meretia pronounced Merisha. Far from becky right? @evilangel I hate that so much i once talked to a guy and he said "if it aint light or white it aint right" i hate stupid ignorant stuff like that. I dont deal with it and when guys or people ask me what i am i hate that too it doesnt matter. I actually had a white guy try talking to me and when he asked what i was and i told him he was like oh i didnt know i only mess with light skinned or latinas and he said nice meeting you though what is that about.
I knew this comment section would be popping. Atleast this time it comes from an articulate source versus Reggie & KK. Sometimes in life a person truly does just happen 2 fall *** luv with sum1 of the opposite race. I even did once with a coworker. The problem is too many blacks more than any other race are exclusively dating outside cus they feel it's an upgrade.
CONTD... A Harvard trained Critical Race Theorist Derrick Bell (A black man by the way, who quite teaching at harvard because they would not hire a black FEMALE professor, I say this, in case some of you, discount him for being a "sell out") talks about the convergence interest theories, that the plight of black peeps are only going to get better as a much faster rate if there is something to be benefited for the white man as well. Flowing from that theory, I do not see why anyone will want to advocate for keeping the "races" separate. I mean people should be allowed to date whoever they want
@misshugrad I'm puttting out what I see. You do have some black women treat white men greatly than black men. And sorry I did said Y'all. Sorry about that. But I don't have a sour taste in my mouth. If any sour taste I have is because this bash against black men is STILL GOING ON. We as blacks are fallin in relationship. Majority are not right in the mind. We are too divided. Everybody wanna be the boss instead of being co-CEOs. We blaming each other but not taking the responsibiity of our own actions.
Another view point could be that maybe it’s time for black women to start taking the *** by the horns and approaching the men that they want rather then waiting for one to come and find them….when I told this to my female cousin all she could do was laugh in my face as if it was beneath her to approach and ask a man out….the first words out of her mouth was “why do I have to do that when a white girl can just sit on her hands”…..and that’s when I said “well you’re the one that’s complaining about the situation”….and then I added on that she can sit around with her girlfriends and stew about how *** off that they are at black men for going with white/Asian/Latina women….but at the end of the day guys will only see them as sour chicks with attitude and will continue to avoid them….I guess that’s one of the big differences between black men and black women….guys just want to be happy by achieving their needs….women want to be happy but it has to come in a storybook way
OH LAWD!!!!! HOW IN THE F_UCK DO WE KNOW THAT THIS ESSAY ACTUALLY CAME FROM JILL SCOTT?!?! SMH! ALL THE BACK/FORTH BULLSH*T COULD BE ALL FOR NOTHING!!!! MTO IS PROBABLY LYING....AS USUAL!!! I'll NEED TO SEE AN ACTUALLY COPY OF THE ESSAY BEFORE I COME AT POSTERS FOUL AND UN-LADY LIKE...STOP REACHING MTO!!!
Black women dont worry about the black man anymore. Just start doing you. Cause when you start doing you. An kno longer want the black man. Kno other race will either. They only want what black women want. Cause without you the black man want be sh!t.
====
These IRR threads always leave me confused and mystified. I’m confused because I am fully aware that IRR isn’t just exclusively between Black men and White women…yet, hearing some of you on here…it would make it seem as if, IRR is only a black man’s disease.
Again, what are you upset about? Are you upset that black man is *** some non-black broad?...Are you upset because you believe that black men who dates IRR are basing it on their fall-out or distaste for some black women…or are you upset about IRR in general? Be specific in your response?
Because, if you are upset about IRR then, clearly I’ve seem more fronting from black women on here, who claimed they are involved in IRR and are happy about it. In fact, there are more posters of black women with their white boyfriends and husbands on their Avi, promoting them as white Gods…in fact, there are more usernames of women on here that express their love for white men..
Again, I ask you broads on here…what is your real issue?
I find it interesting, that even a purported Tranny would come on a public Blog to express his dislike about who some anonymous black man is ***…and encouraging black woman to “Just Start doing You”. Isn’t’ that odd? What is your agenda? Are you really a tranny or some MTO concoctions design to make a mockery of the Negro?
Ahahah!!! You women have away of cheapening your arguments and stances on these issues. You are too emotional and ruled by your feelings. Yet…despite all of the statistics and number on IRR…you are still hell-bent on believing your on made-up concoctions.
To my historians on here…many of you American Negroes have mix blood…not because of the Negro male *** the Master’s white wife…it’s the other way around.
My argument is simple…if you disapprove of IRR, then disapproves them all…if you approve of one…then approves them all…if you are going to throw fire, throw flames at them all
The moment you began making excuses for some group versus others, your entire argument will fall on death’s ear…it make you sound painfully bitter and pathetic.
CONTD, and if they choose members from another race, and have mixed children, do you agree that that white mother or white father, might be more sympathetic to the cause of the oppressed group, seeing that their partner or child belongs to that group?? I mean is that a possibility? I just say this, because I am not one to dwell on historical injustices as much as it PAINS me. I d rather devise ways to at least help ameliorate the consequences of said injustices. And I just do not see how a black man dating a white woman OR a black women dating a white man, can be detrimental to this cause.
2: blk women Most of u do frown up when u see a blk man with a white woman stop it & don't stare. They just get a rise out of it. U kno most of the time their ugly or out of shape anyways aka a white mans reject.
To BM date Becky all u want just dint stereotype & disrespect BW *** the process. To WW: Quit being so insensitive. U will never understand what it's like 2b black. I adopt a black skinned African child & watch then come home many days crying from getting teased about their hair texture & skin color.
@jayanderson07:
There are sistas on this thread talking about all sorts of things. I’LL SCROLL up to see WHERE black women are saying “bad” things about black men in this thread. Seems like most of us were discussing black men dating outside their race. Here you come with the “some of ya’ll dont deserve good men”. For some REASON your brain automatically went to this rant about bad apples.
Take it a STEP HIGHER and respond to those of us who are living life successfully.
And no one is trying to "check you". Why the sensitivity and defensiveness? Please don't tell me your gonna be a black man who cant handle a black woman with a strong opinion. Next I’m gonna be called “bitter” right? It’s called a DISCUSSION. Can you handle that brotha?
OH! And another thing that ive noticed with this interracial thing. When a blk man, and even a blk woman, gets a in a relationship with someone white, they r married within a few years. Conversely, when blk men/blk women get into a relationship with a blk person, they could b dating for 10 yrs sometimes with CHILDREN, they STILL very rarely get married. U cant tell me this is only by chance.
Educate yourself, playing ignorant is even more insulting to the matter. It has been less than 70 years, of us Having a newfound freedom. My brother's don't forget Emitt Till. Wolves in Sheep Clothing. Do some history homework...read what your parents, grandparents, uncles, and aunties went through to give you the right to speak freely NOW!
In Jill Scott entire essay she explain how she felt about IR dating, But she never once gave valid reason as to what's wrong with it! Or the harm of it! Only at the end of her essay did she say how sistas with fatherless babies could use those *Successful blk men*... I challenge anyone in hear to give me a valid reasoning why IR dating is wrong, and Why people should date and marry only of there own color!
You got to remember alot of women have bad experience from black males since the age of 16. Some of them wanna date an older men thinking they on the same level as them. Don't know that older men can trick a young chik on doing things he want her to do. Some of y'all went against what daddy want you to date. He want you to date a good brother, but no you wanna date the bad boy. And when you date a few more and get your heart broken you want to be mad and bitter and say all men are dawgs when daddy TOLD YOU From the beginning get the good brother.
@kerrin: Hispanic isn't a race but a nationality/heritage/culture. Not trying to use myself as an example but I was born & raised in Honduras,Central America but I'm still very much a black woman or Afro-Hispanic...just saying Hispanics just like AA/Blacks come in all shades with an array of physical features.
@AzShun: AGREED.
LMAO at people thinking we have come THAT far. The biggest difference today is that it is INSTITUTIONALIZED RACISM. But i'm not surprised, these kids today are so self-absorbed. They have a LONG way to go. Hopefully one day they'll get there.
And if the way the GOP is treating Barack isn't proof ENOUGH of the REALITY of this country's attitude towards people of color, I don't know what is.
@misshugrad Yeah some women don't deserve a good brother just like some men don't deserve a good woman. Some ppl can't handle what a good man brings to the table. Some don't know how to deal with a good man because their common sense are not shaped right because all the bs she's been through. Why would a good man should date a woman who don't know how to treat a man good, who to be a good woman, be a good mother to kids, etc. *** I if don't know how to be a good man, WHY do I deserve a good woman. Ppl got to get their MIND RIGHT. POINT BLANK. And this is a debate. lol. I LOVE THE CHALLENGE.
What we embody is everything 'they' could and would not understand. To indulge everyday, knowing you are sneered at, and looked down upon, we still hold our head high in the air, proving you, nor 'they', will break me from this fight. We are NOT confused, however YOU are, the unspeakable remaints from that day when YOU were bound and gagged, and did NOT even have an IDENTITY, YOU were their farm machines, maids, as well as beating bag when 'They' had a bad day. You make it look easy to forget, we make it hard. We fight hard to make sure there is a relevence to our being, You do not.
Bi-polar
Re-Read the essay and tell me that she didn't articulate the *** out of her thesis! Very well received, so I am interested in reading more of her work! Hey tiplite I read ur responses the other day to Manifest and it was impressive! BTW, Jill is making her opinion known! This type of writing is the same content that Hill Harper was spewing & we see who he choose as a mate.
@misshugrad-Thanks love! I'm glad I'm hearing from someone besides MTO. Lol! Thanks for correction. :) @Da_advocator-Once again, your intelligent has shown through. Granted, your post are raw, uncut and hard to digest but you never disrespect anyone by calling them words of profanity and slinging mud and doing "the dozen". Two thumbs up (wink).
The whole point is to forget about the bridge that brought you over so you date outside of "black" or if you do date a black women that is brown or dark, make sure you keep reminding her that you could do better (white or biracial) so she should be grateful. That has been the game for 10 years. I am all for exercising options in 2010.
IR dating is not wrong but noone should date exclusively outside their race it doesn't make theoritical sense. What possible reason could one have? What is this preference it should not include generalizing or European features. If I have a son I will encourage him to marry a good moral, educated BW, becus their is a *** of educated, black 2 parent homes. Hey Tastysis
@akademics7 Some of them don't know. They think a woman who handle her business, take care of their kids and take no ish from a man or anybody.
I'ma dude and my grandma and many other elder old skool told me that saying is true but not he answer. A strong black woman is a person who weathering many storm and still keep a good character. Meaning that if a negro dawgs them they will keep their head up high and move on. Not slashing tires, keying cars, cutting his *** or calling and stalking. She keeps a good smile on her face and move on.
My question is who really wants to be with a black man anyway. They are nothing but trouble - even the succesful ones.
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There you go...yet, despite the fact that many of you women feel this way about the black man, you still *** and complain about who he is ***.
Why? is it about control? is it about abandonment? Is it about jealousy? Do you want white women for yourselves? It is about making yourself appear better and bigger than the black man?
What is it about? ahahah!! Please enlighten me..
If everybody was as narrow-minded as she is there wouldn't be a man of color in the White House; not that I agree on everything he does. I guess she wouldn't mind if a crackhead black man married a white woman since she placed the emphasis on successful. This is a trip, how you gonna tell grown folks who and what they should marry nowadays. And it seems that the more people speak against it the more folks gonna F**K you they want. Besides, it is a two-way street. Black dudes and white women do freaky things together.
@tiplite2004 she said nothing of the sort that IR is wrong. she simply took the time out to explain how she felt and justified her feelings through the essay. i completely understand where shes coming from. its not wrong @ all to date outta of ur race however this is and forever will be a personal issue among blk men & woman. its like we blk women were blk mens backbone through the worst of times and when things looked seemingly better they go and date from the exact same race that had hated us for so many yrs wat a slap in the face.
@emmetmay:
Well when caucasian people have been enslaved for 400+ years and their motherland has been exploited almost past recovery THEN it can be called "hypocrisy". Until that day comes us, even if I wanted to, I couldn't even come close to comparing the history of blacks versus whites and all of our present day conditions. Two COMPLETELY different playing fields. Like comparing apples to oranges.
I wouldn't even disrespect our ancestors and their struggle by calling black attitudes "racist". That's an insult.
Jill, you answered your own questions. Yes, you are jealous of the white woman, and the favor she received. You're angry and bitter about it, understandably so.
But LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION. HOW does holding onto that bitterness benefit your life?? You are successful and gorgeous and no one is denying you of any freedoms today.
The sting you feel has alot more to do with your own insecurities, than anything that man or woman has done to you. You are giving away your power by placing BM on the same pedestal WW were once placed on. Let it go....
Greekness
I am of African decent & was born in America! Africa & Hati r suffering at the hands of the Europeans! Why is it pausable 4 me 2 discuss the damage that goes on in a country that I am not a native of, when we have our own problems here! This is the topic of the day! Not Hati, & not Africa. Stick 2 the subject or leave! This topic goes much deeper than who a brotha chooses 2 wife. I wouldn't expect u 2 understand, or delve deeper than the surface.
IR dating is not wrong but noone should date exclusively outside their race it doesn't make theoritical sense. What possible reason could one have?
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Ok...so you argument is one person, should date exclusively outside of their race. So, a black man can marry a white woman, just as long he had dated or *** black women in the past?
My question to you is...how many black men versus black women you know date exclusively outside of their race...meaning they have never dated their own?
I am a business woman, with degrees to match, Not racist, however outspoken, passion is always behind my thoughts, I appeal to every race, I do not see my self beneath anyone, however I am above my own expectations. Raised Southern Baptist, and so so blessed. He makes it impossible to NOT see. Bring up each other.
I agree with Jill Scott. Blackmen have no respect for the Black race, Culture or Family anymore. Like Jill, I find, it EXTREMELY DISTRUBING when I see any Blackman with a white woman.
It is such a loss, and it is dishearting to see it. I guess, Blackmen feel so much better with a Becky on their arm until white society lets them know how they really feel about them.
I saw her in a preview of her new movie and she portrays exactly the kind of black woman we don't want. Loud, angry, threatening to kick her man's ***, mean as a snake. She couldn't hold her first marriage together, she couldn't hold on to her second baby daddy now she is breathing fire. This woman needs to check her attitude and figure out why men keeping running away from her fat angry ***.
Even though Ms. Scott placed her words in a very eloquent manner and I respect her for giving an opinion however I’m going to have to disagree. First of all, there is no ownership between Black men and women. Why in the world does she feel her “soul is burning” whenever she sees a Black man with a white woman? How is this or why is this going to affect her? Many sistas as well as many brothas have this automatic assumption whenever they see a BM with a WW or WM with BW that he/she is a sellout when 9 times out of 10 (10/10 lol) they don’t even know the men or women and their reasons for dating. It seems to me that the reason why people pay attention to other people’s relationships because they’re not in one or are in one but are not satisfied. I really don’t understand why many people are getting their panties in a bunch when the OVERWHEMLING majority of BM date or marry BW and vice versa. No matter what their social-economic status, BM gravitates towards BW and its well over 90%. The rest are in interracial relationships (which is less than or close to 10%). The comparison of the two percentages is not significant. There’s this racial fear mongering that has been imposed towards the Black community making many believe that when BM they become successful or remotely successful that they ALWAYS go grab a WW. Now in SOME cases yes, that does happen but many people especially BW believe that occurs every time when in fact it doesn’t happen as often as they would think. I think the media has a major role into this mentality. In the case of BM, the ones who are very popular (entertainers, businessmen, athletes, and political figures) that are in interracial relationships are GOING to receive the most attention from the media. The ones who are dating or marrying within their own race, do not get the same attention as those who are outside. The media does not focus on things or events that happen within the norm but rather look at different occurrences because that would be boring to the public. This distorts or alters the perception of many BM/BW as they are continually being bombarded with things such as what’s been stated above and do not happen on a grand scale. Maybe it’s because I’m a man but I really don’t understand why so many BW feel the way Jill Scott does when there’s SO MUCH evidence that goes against this. Now I want to digress a little, when I hear a BW say that there’s a *** of “good” BM, I say to them “Do you think you deserve one?”.
@ all to date outta of ur race however this is and forever will be a personal issue among blk men & woman. its like we blk women were blk mens backbone through the worst of times and when things looked seemingly better they go and date from the exact same race that had hated us for so many yrs wat a slap in the face
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That's another myth...you being the backbone...i would make a case for that several centuries ago...not today...not the moment you were transplanted to the the "Americas"...the backbone was broken long ago
It is such a loss, and it is dishearting to see it. I guess, Blackmen feel so much better with a Becky on their arm until white society lets them know how they really feel about them.
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i agree...now go get you a white boy and show black men how proud you are...
ahahaha!!! again you sound pathetic...
My problem is that ppl date outside because of the hate they have with their race. "I can't find a good black man, so I'ma go white.". "I'ma date a white woman, because I see nothing but baby making gold digging sistas." And thats just BS. If you date outside, do it because you find the person LIKEABLE. Doing it because you tired of black men or black women is just a cornball statement. You just had bad choices.
another thing alot of successful *** come from da hood filled hoodrat *** who love thugs and they did'nt want the educated ***, these *** were called *** a becuase they did'nt have a criminal record, or *** wounds, *** thought they were soft becuase they treated these hoes with respect , these hoes chose the *** ass *** who aint *** over them and when these *** ass knock these hoes up and abandon them with a *** child they lookin stupid and wonder why the *** who got they *** together dont wanna be bothered with them
@liquidcracc... I understand... Blk Women and blk men where together exclusively for 1000's of years but the last 400 years we where force to only date one another because of fear of what would happen if u jump that fence! Now... The blk men are not like me.. They are not just ***.king these women of different races! They're marrying them which means they love them and we all know u can not control the heart..
Saying that, Black men need to wise up and take care of business. Keep your *** in school, learn a trade, stop popping out babies with different women, stop partying all the time and grow up
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Great...I like that...bravo...every black men should expire to greatness...
Now..what does that have to do with IRR?
I for one am not an advocate of mixing the races. Although the children don't have a choice, it just causes too many problems. We are living in the judgement now! My thing is why after 6,000 years all of a sudden everybody is equal. Those snakes are using their last weapon to take you to the fire with them!
If a large number have a allowed black men to reduce them to big booty-shaking ghetto-fabulous chicken-heads on strip poles in *** rap videos, what is there left to respect & uphold about black females who accept being called every dirty name in the book and reduced to worthless babies mommas? Jill you married your so-called Black Prince, what happened? Check yourself, love & relationship is more than just a color. Stop being bitter & stuck in back in the day. Back in the day, Black men respected & courted Black women.
