: MediaTakeOut.com;s pals over at the site Blackbook.org sent us this report. It's reportedly from one of Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino's ex-jumpoffs:
Wow, what a let down. It was a Tuesday night and I was at home with my roommates. I had asked if they wanted to go out but nobody really felt like it. Then I got a call from a friend saying the cast of Jersey Shore was at Karma where he had a VIP booth.So me and my friends set a land-speed record getting ready and jumped in a cab. When we got there my friend came out and got us. As soon as we got inside "The Situation" walked up to me and introduced himself. He gave me a kiss on the cheek and I almost fainted.
He bought me a drink and said they were getting ready to leave soon and asked if I wanted to party with them. YES, I was one of Mike's random hook-ups on the show. We all took some shots before me and him went upstairs.
His body is the hottest thing about him. He's a good kisser but he screws like he's trying to stab someone to death. He's not very big. He's fat but not super long. And he came pretty quick, which was fine with me. (I was getting ready to fake an orgasm anyway)
When he came he made this funny noise, almost like a squeak. And I didn't say anything at the time, but I think he may have farted too. I was pretty drunk so I just fell asleep after that. The next morning me and my friend left early. He tried to call me after that, but I'd had enough of that little "situation."
FIRST AND FOREMOST, DA *** IS THIS FOOL DOING ON MTO? AN URBAN, BLACK BLOG SITE?
SECOND OF ALL, I RESENT ALL THEM MOFOS FROM JERSEY SHORE, ESPECIALLY THIS POPEYE LOOKIN ***! I JUST READ IN A MAGAZINE THAT HE DEMANDS PEOPLE NOT LOOK IN HIS EYES OR DIRECTLY SPEAK TO HIM? WHAT??! THIS DUDE AINT TALENT! HE'S APART OF A *** REALITY SHOW! SINCE WHEN DOES THAT EARN YOU CELEBRITY STATUS?? IM SO SICK AND TIRED OF SEEING THESE *** ATTENTION *** REALITY STARS ON MAGAZINES AND WEBSITES LIKE THEY ARE ACTUALLY GIFTED AT SOMETHING! MEANWHILE THERE ARE ACTUAL,REAL TALENTED ARTISTS OUT THERE WHO CANT EVEN GET A SONG ON THE RADIO! NEVERMIND THE ACTORS THAT STRUGGLE FOR *** JOBS! WHAT MAKES THE JERSEY SHORE SUCH A RELEVANT CONCEPT? ITS A BUNCH OF ITALIAN, ORANGE COLORED FOLK *** AROUND AND BEING WHITE TRASH! COMMON WHITE TRASH!!
Even though FendiVuitton is going a bit hard, I agree with the fact that they really aren't relevant. I know their show was hot, but hot to who? And honestly, if she went home with him expecting fireworks, this makes the point that anyone who is all crazy about the cast is probably a bama too!!! LOL!
U can tell he's fckn wack in bed....and she's dumb for thinkin he had it goin on lmao...but like really evry1 except (for Pauly D cause I like him...he's cute lmao...and he DJ's) is lame on this show...y are they in movies, on magazine covers and commercials...they aint nothin but some non-talented...ugly pale *** wanna be orange oompa lompa low budget ghetto whoring italians...I'm tired od seein that ll fat, *** brat doll look alike runt Snooki..always tryna race 2 sleep wit the most "juiceheads" hoe *** airheaded ***
LOL WHATEVER I TAKE GROUPIE STATEMENTS AS SOME FACT AND MOSTLY FICTION , PLUS ONE WOMENS BAD "SITUATION" IS A ANOTHER WOMENS "BIG" ONE ... SO ITS WHATEVER AND THE GIRL SPOUTING OFF ABOUT WHITEY BEING ON THE URBAN BLOG SITE ....WOW YOU SOUND IGNORANT AS HELL ... DIDN'T KNOW URBAN MENT FOR BLACKS ONLY ... SERIOUSLY! CUT THAT *** OUT
Im surprised these ***.iggaz aint got herpes with as many random h.oes they kiss on the everyday bases.. Who does that s.hit??? I'm not going to a club and kissin no b.itch... It must be a reality t.v thing cuz aint enough alcohol in the world that would get me to stick my tongue down a girls throat I just met...
