@@@ (Ajent) YOU SAID-- "He'll look back on this and laugh and be glad he had a father care enough to discipline and make sure he didn't grow up like a lot of other ignorant kids with no sense."-------
Exactly my man----As a child my father imposed a no nonsense zero-tolerance parenting method--- especially when it came to matters of education and any misbehavior on my part involving school related incidences.
My father would work 14 hour days, and at times double shifts, and triple shifts, at Ford Motor Truck Plant Detroit. When he finally would come home from work, he would be exhausted and hungry, and due to his efforts, never once was the electricity ever cut off, and food was always in abundance in the refrigerator and pantry.
However, misbehavior was treated with swift and firm physical discipline. My father instilled in me that there are detrimental consequences for bad choices and behavior.
In other words, he reinforced in me that if one insists on acting egregiously, then one should not expect for good things to be the outcome, yet bad things to be the outcome.
And this is the primary reason why too many children of this so-called New Day- New Wave hands off your children parenting approach is not working.--- children face very little, to no penalty for bad behavior, and often are even being rewarded for bad behaviors and choices--- so there is no incentive for them to act appropriately, and no REAL penalties for them to fear when they act inappropriately.
This is not exclusively a Black issue, it is indeed also a White issue. Children as well as young adults are being rewarded for maleficent behaviors and actions---thus we live in a Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton generation, where one can become wealthy and famous for becoming essential whores, drunkards, and drug addicts. All the while teachers, scientist, and scholars in general are living paycheck to paycheck.
I too while growing up disliked my father and told him so on many occasions, and his response was always the same---"I am not here to be your friend, I am here to raise you so that one day you will become a successful adult" end of story.
Many years later after having achieved two Master Degrees and a Doctorate---I can say with absolute exuberance-- I love my father---I love many people, but my father I love the most, and will continue to tell him so as much as time will allow.
You see, without my father's no-nonsense approach to parenting-- especially growing up in Detroit, there is no doubt in my mind that I would be one of the 2.5 million currently incarcerated, in some penal institution, somewhere in America, or even more probable-- deceased.
Parents need to stop trying to be their children's friend and become parents--so what if your child thinks he or she hates you from time to time---stop being so soft and weak---because when those very same children that claim to hate you grow up to be fine productive adults, they will look back to the butt-whippings, and not only will they laugh---they will thank you for all of them--- because now as adults they will understand that those butt-whippings were not out of hate or even anger, but out of love.
I no longer live in Detroit, and neither does my father and mother. I have been fortunate enough to move my family to much more breathtaking vistas. And although I will always have love for Detroit and still visit old friends when time allows, it is due to the stern discipline my father gave me that today affords me the options to reside wherever in the world I choose to reside.
Yes, I love my father--- you have better believe it-- and would not take back not even one of those butt-whippings he gave me- in trade for the life I so enjoy today....Artofwar