It truly hurts my heart reading some of these comments. I feel so much hate. I had to create an account to say something.
I am a man, not in a relationship and I haven't been for years. I have not had sexual contact with anyone for years. I am living life alone when it comes to a relationship. I am not happy. This is not a happy life. It's very lonely. It doesn't change who I am inside. I've prayed going back to my teen years. Let me say that MY God and I have a very great relationship. I believe in the higher power.
I want to start with the word "gay". It seems that the first thing that comes to peoples mind with the word "gay" is anal sex and HIV. I am one who doesn't follow the statistics or the latest observations when it comes to HIV, so I won't comment on that. I do know that if two people who don't have aids and are loyal to each other and doesn't have sexual contact with an HIV + person, or share needles, etc, they will not contract the virus. THAT is fact, and THAT is a revelation in itself that HIV was not born from same sex contact. Â And the main thing I hear when someone is gossiped about being gay is along the lines: "Yeah, you can tell he likes it up the butt."
Same sex relationships do not exist just because a guy wants to have another man inside of him. That notion, alone, sounds ignorant just even typing it right now. A true relationship is about being with that one person who you feel a connection with, formed out of mutual love. Just sharing life, time and space, forming an emotional connection, and of course a physical connection will be shared also. Every same sex couple does not practice penetration, I am living proof of that, as I have never liked it, giving or receiving, neither with a man or a woman. (Yes, I have been with both at times in my life. And no, not on the down low). There are many other ways to physically be with a partner that doesn't include penetration (And no, I am not referring to oral sex either).
Now, what "the word of God" and the majority of the religious community, along with the conservatives ask of me to do, is to not be "gay", or to not act on the feelings that I, which have never happened with a female, ever.
So am I to just live life alone? The religious will say "You can't have it all. You can't have heaven on earth. Follows God word now so you can have it all with the All Mighty in heaven." Â OR am I to find a woman to be with and pretend that I feel the way a person SHOULD feel in a true relationship? Especially if you are an decent looking/attractive man and you go so long with having a girlfriend or going out much, those close to you will suspect and they will ask (At least in my life they have).
****This is where the down low mentality is born****
You have these guys who want to either live by "the word of God" or... they do not want to be labeled gay, for whatever reasons, and deal with all of the stigma that the label brings with it. They try not to act on what they feel... trying not to act on what the "devil has somehow placed inside of their spirit". Trying not to act on what "feels natural", because it is "unnatural" & against the laws of nature, despite their being homosexual activity in over a thousand other species. My heart hurts for these guys. Some go int these relationships with women to try and "live right", but fail and succumb to what they truly are attracted to because they feel a void inside if them. Some go into these relationships with women just to put up a front to be socially accepted, but behind closed doors, they are cheating on their women with men (But you can't just single out the same sex incidents because the same is happening in "straight" relationships).
I chose the lonely route. Why? Not to live by "the word of God", which I don't believe THAT BIBLE. There have been too many MEN in power who have tampered with, changed, and simply made up stuff to place in it as the Holy word.
I am living life lonely to live comfortably with some peace of mind in my society, includingÂ family and friends. My family is old school Baptist and I have male friends who have used derogatory language in the presence of various people who, to them, look gay.Â
BY the way, there is no such thing as looking gay, walking gay, or acting gay. Â Since when does fashion, colors, hobbies, or mannerisms dictate what is on the inside of a person or who you want to spend your life with.
As an AMERICAN, same sex people should have the same privileges as everyone else. The heart of America is supposed to justice & liberty for all as human beings. Just as people are free to practice whatever religion they like, people should be able to marry who they like. It is understandable for you to have your belief as a Christian and to raise your children as you see fit, but as an American, for something as harmless a marriage, to legally be connected to the person you love, that is a right.Â
As far as the comparisons to "being attracted to children or animals"... that is TOTALLY different. Animals are not humans. They have no intelligence, a least not like a human. And children are children. They are protected BY Law because they are not fully developed as a grown human, andÂ can be taken advantage of, etc. That is a given. But with two adults, with something as harmless as love, who is another person to deny another person love, or to have the law not acknowledge what they have as love.
As long as you are living right within your beliefs and witnessing to others and spreading the word out of love, I think that is wonderful.
But when you use the word to infringe on what should be a human right, even if God, as described in the bible, calls it an abomination, I don't believe he would Â approve of oppressing, shaming, and belittling another. Instead, pray for them. Jesus came and died for our sins. We all sin. No sin is greater than another.
And on another note, with the unnatural laws of nature, once again, that is picking and choosing. If someone wants to be literal with it, many and most, if not all can simply look in the mirror. We are not born with tattoos, piercings, permed hair, hair dye, and for some, plastic surgery/body enhancmenst. These are things we 100% choose to do.
I choose to wake up alone, go to sleep alone, and have no one to share life with the way people do in relationships. I did not choose to have an attraction to guys. If I could choose, I would chose a woman so that I could have someone to share my life with and love the way I know love is meant to be. I could have days where there is no shame of what I am and I would know that there was not a possibility of my parents and grand parents being ashamed of me. I am an upstanding citizen. I don't drink or smoke. I am very respectful to people from all walks of life and I help where I can. Yet, am I to live alone or live a lie to be socially "right".
How wonderful it would be to find someone, fall madly in love and just run away from this life, leaving family behind and just living in harmony. But I wouldn't dare break my parents hearts.
I just wanted to give a deep view from my perspective. If anything, I hope that it helps to lessen the frustration many have towards "alternative lifestyles".Â